Ways therapy teaches you self-love

Self-love can be a tricky concept to understand. After all, we all love ourselves deep down, despite what we may think. However, there is a world of difference between someone looking down on themselves and attaining true self-love. The process of reaching the state where you truly love yourself for who you are can be quite challenging. Many people opt to achieve this by enrolling in one of the best affordable online therapy programs. And they have the right idea. The way that therapy teaches you self-love is through slowly having you realize the fundamental truths in your life. But why is self-love so important? What are the ways in which therapy teaches you to love yourself? Those are the questions we will be talking about today.

What is self-love?

Before we start talking about its importance, we first need to understand what self-love is. Self-love can have many definitions, but the one we like the most is that self-love simply means that you value your own happiness and well-being. There are many ways in which someone can express self-love, such as caring for themselves, meeting personal needs, non-judgmental thinking, etc. Overall, to love yourself means that you are considering yourself to be deserving of happiness and are taking steps to achieve it.

"you are loved" badge, symbolizing how therapy teaches you self-love
Make sure to give yourself plenty of reminders.

However, mental health issues can make it extremely difficult for someone to love themselves. Anxiety, for example, can bring about feelings of being useless. When a person feels like they do not deserve to be happy, that is when attaining self-love becomes incredibly difficult. However, the spark of self-love is always there, waiting to grow into a full-fledged fire. A person who is willing to attend one of the best online anxiety therapy courses is on the right track to learning to love themselves. The first step is always understanding that there is a problem and seeking a way to remedy it. Professional therapists are there not only to help you overcome your mental health issues, but they are also there to teach you self-love.

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Why is self-love so important?

The fact of the matter is that none of us can be truly content with our lives if we cannot accept and love ourselves for who we are. Self-love is a vital component of self-esteem and our overall health. People who love themselves are generally happier, more resilient, and derive greater satisfaction from their lives. They also benefit from improved relationships.

Self-love makes you more resilient

A person who truly loves themselves will be able to overcome many difficult life events (divorce, death in the family, illness, etc.) a lot more easily than someone who does not. Self-love is so important that many people decide to enroll in online family therapy courses to overcome their difficulties and learn how to be happier at the same time. Due to the added resilience that self-love brings, future issues (both mental and physical) will be diminished as well.

Self-love enhances relationships

two people holding hands
Self-love enhances relationships.

Successful relationships are another aspect of self-love. After all, you need to be able to love yourself before loving someone else and getting their love in return. Over the years, numerous studies have proved that self-love and compassion are two primary pillars of interpersonal relationships. With this in mind, it is no wonder that many people choose to attend the best online CBT therapy courses to make their relationships better. The truth of the matter is that, sometimes, therapy may be the only way to achieve true self-love.

How does therapy teach you self-love?

Lack of self-love is, fundamentally, a mental health issue. It may not be as important as some of the other issues, such as anxiety and depression, but it is a mental health issue nonetheless. Mental health therapy is designed to help with all mental health issues, self-love included. In fact, the best online therapy for depression actually focuses quite a bit on self-love. People who are struggling with depression usually have low self-esteem, which is a derivate feeling from the lack of self-love. But then they go to therapy, and they get much better over time. The ways that therapy teaches you self-love is through several core principles:

  • “Perfect” does not exist
  • The problem is not with you
  • There’s a world of difference between reality and perceived reality
  • Self-respect leads to self-love

Aside from these core principles that every mental health therapy follows, you and the therapist will work on your specific condition. Every mental health issue is fully unique, after all, and it requires time, effort, and willingness to change. But since you are attending the therapy session, you have proven the latter. Now, let’s take a look at exactly how therapy teaches you self-love through these principles.

Therapy teaches you self-love by showing you that “perfect” does not exist

a man in a red shirt, thinking about how therapy teaches you self-love
The sooner you realize perfection does not exist, the better.

In today’s world, it is quite common to feel “not good enough”. Many people are striving toward a “perfect” ideal and feel bad about themselves when they do not achieve it. You may set unrealistic goals, or you might compare yourself to an athlete or a celebrity, which will usually make you feel lacking. Or you simply might think that you need to be perfect in everything you do. All those feelings contribute toward a lack of self-love. Luckily, therapy is there to show you that it is not all as bad as you might think.

You might already know that perfection is unattainable, but you usually need to hear it from someone else to really drive the point home. Many people who attend even the best online therapy for OCD programs stated that it was their therapist’s words that really changed how they think. They may have read the words in a self-help book, but it was someone else emphatically telling them that did the “trick”.

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Therapy teaches you self-love by explaining that the problem is not you

We all criticize ourselves from time to time. We may fail in some task and say, “If only I have done something else”, or we may fail to live up to our expectations. And therein lies the problem, within our expectations. The problem is never us, to begin with, but our expectations of what we could be. By thinking that we are inadequate for any reason, we stop ourselves from attaining true self-love.

What therapy does is point out that your happiness is all that matters. You are not the problem; the “ideal you” is what is the problem. While many adults have these problems, they are more prevalent in teenagers. Luckily, the best online therapy for teens is practically designed to help teenagers overcome their perceptions. By working with a professional therapist, you will learn to understand that what you think will make you happier is not necessarily what will make you happier.

Therapy will teach you that there is a difference between reality and perceived reality

Most people who have self-love issues tend to think in the extremes. This mode of thinking, also known as “Black-and-White” thinking, is highly detrimental to one’s happiness. But life is not all about black and white. In fact, life is all about the different shades of gray and other colors. Rarely is any situation purely black or purely white. More often than not, other colors mix in.

The best way for you to understand this is to attend a specialized therapy course. The best online DBT therapy, for example, is all about allowing you to understand how your perceived reality influences your decisions. After you attain that understanding, you will be able to change the way you think. You are your greatest critic, after all.

You will learn what matters the most to you

pancakes with caramel topping
Do not feel bad if you like to eat delicious food.

Sometimes, attaining self-love means finding out what matters to you the most. While you may think that this is self-evident, the reality will often disagree. We mentioned how people could have “skewed” perceptions that do not allow them to view themselves in a favorable light. By undergoing therapy, you will have access to a professional analyst who will help you understand your true goals and motivations.

Let’s say that, for example, you do not like the way your teeth look. While that may be the issue, and all you need are the best clear aligners on the market, sometimes the issue is deeper than that. It may happen that you are actually connecting your teeth to a deeper failing, one that you berate yourself for. By working with a therapist, you will come to understand the reasons behind your actions. And, through understanding, you will be able to work toward attaining true self-love.

You will learn that self-respect is the way to self-love

While self-love is extremely important, you can’t love yourself before learning to respect who you are. This is the first step you need to take if you want to be able to truly love yourself. By talking to a professional therapist, you will learn to understand what it is, exactly, that is stopping you from respecting yourself. Over time, you and your therapist will work toward improving your self-respect. Once you do learn to respect yourself, you will find that you are much closer to true self-love than you have ever been before.

One thing you need to understand, though, is that therapy is an ongoing process. You may not see the effects immediately, but over time. Yes, some people might feel a lot better even after a session or two, but building self-love usually takes a bit more time. Like relationships, self-love builds over time. You need to show yourself that you care, be consistent in your actions, and enjoy spending time alone. And all that takes time.

Self-love does not just “happen”

As with most other things, self-love is a skill you can practice. It is not something that you can attain by getting a new job position. Yes, getting a promotion certainly helps, but it will not allow you to suddenly love yourself. If you were hard on yourself before, it is only a matter of time before you do it again, despite any promotions or achieved goals. We’re not saying that you should not strive for those things because you should, but that they are not what will allow you to reach true self-love.

What you need to do instead is focus on what you are doing every single day. Every time you criticize your actions, thoughts, or behaviors, stop thinking about what you’re doing and adopt a more positive approach. It is very easy to say that you will love yourself after you lose weight, for example, but that is just an excuse. Try to do it in reverse instead. Understand that you deserve the good things that are happening to you, and the good things will come. This might sound foolish, but at the end of the day, it is the truth.

Therapy teaches you self-love, so give it a try

You see, life comes with both good and bad things. It is you who chooses what importance to assign to each of them. If you lack self-love, you will consider every bad thing that happens to you to be your fault. But if you love yourself, then you will focus on the positive things instead. The bad things will simply be obstacles that you need to overcome before the good things inevitably arrive.

Unfortunately, this way of thinking is extremely hard to attain without assistance. That is why most people choose to attend therapy sessions. Therapy teaches you self-love like nothing else can, after all, because therapy is all about you. No one else.

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For more information on how therapy can better your life and the best online therapy options, refer to the Consumer Opinion Guide. We will provide you with any and all information you might need to overcome any mental health issue you may have! Or to simply become a better you.

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